Out of chaos…

Or, an unexpected ah-hah!

I’m not a huge fan of random!

I’m fine with sudden inspiration. And paintings that don’t follow the plan.

It’s things like not knowing if my knee will do what I pay it for when I want to stand up that are harder for me to deal with. Things that leave me feeling choice-less.

I’m not sure how things feel where you are, but the whole election cycle drama feels like the less-fun kind of random to me.

Dozens and dozens of emails a day. Lots of them trying to scare me into doing more than I can.

And I AM doing what I can!

All of which means getting okay with doing what I can – what is real and true and important according to my understanding – and declining to be guilt-tripped about the rest.

Which, if you’re anything like me, may not be what you learned, growing up! Thus, coping strategies are in order!

Between the knee and the actual politics and a whole bunch of stuff hatching in my head, I’ve spent perhaps even a bit more time than usual hanging out with the gang from The West Wing. (Go ahead and laugh… I can take it!)

In fact, I’ve made it all the way back to Season 3, episode 1… again! (Okay… I may have skipped a few!) And, yes, I’m looking for reminders that hope wins, eventually.

To review… high school kids on a field trip, stuck in the White House during a Secret Service lock-down. The topic of the conversation was terrorism. Today, the Emmy nomination goes to Deputy Communications Director, Sam Seaborn.

What strikes me most about terrorism is its 100% failure rate.

Yep! And Sam went on…

Not only do terrorists always fail at what they’re after… they pretty much always succeed at strengthening what they’re against.

And you, if you’ve been here before, are already pretty sure who the terrorists might be in my version of this story. The ones with massive entitlement issues! And they feel really, really loud.

I’ve decided, though, that I am going to be strengthened by all the attempts to threaten our nation and take away our rights. (You could decide to be strengthened, too!)

And, just this week, I noticed an inspired plan taking shape inside me. I’m pretty sure it’s happening because I’ve blown the dust out of some of my own filters and let some more light in!

More details on the new plan coming soon. (And, yes, there’s art to make and a couple of meetings to have, still… but the inner magic has happened!)

For now… a special offer. Come play Filters in Zoom land with me. You’ll need 90 minutes, a willingness to have a new experience, some paper and markers, and the best $111 you’ll ever spend.

Click HERE!

The elves will send you a calendar link after you’ve registered. (Well, it might be me sending the calendar link… the elves need a bit more inservice training… so a tiny bit of patience would be great!)

This, dear hearts, is how we keep the thems (inner and outer!) who would keep us small, from winning!

And, just in case you’ve played Filters a while back, my Muse yelled plot-twist recently and it’s an even better adventure now!

ps… there’s some good news on the knee front today! The ortho guy is talking exercise instead of adventures involving scalpels and such! Physical Therapy, tomorrow!

pps… ready to go public with your determination? The Legendary Husband’s timely t-shirt has you covered! So hoping you’ll check it out! (Just this week, 10% of the profits go to blue candidates!)

Unexpected glimpses of the Divine Feminine in action!

Friday was an interesting sort of day.

First, a bit of a triumph in the land of t-shirt creation. The mechanical elves were not in a helpful mood, but, finally, the goal was achieved. Just in time, it would seem, if you’ve been watching the news!

Then, my currently problematic kneecap decided to get stuck in a sub-optimal location. This led to a bit of drama involving the knee brace & walking stick & big dogs whimpering in concern .

A bit of lunch and some joint & muscle oil later, things began to look up. It was time to hang out with Annie!

I mean, who could turn down a live (Zoom) Q & A with Anne Lamott??? Not me… even with the crabby knee!

The crowd was filled with writers. Those who claim the label and those still reaching for it. An Intentional Creativity® Sister. And a woman who looked a lot like an old friend. Annie was up for it. We chatted a lot about what to write. And how. And, even, why.

Here are a few of my favorite bits, drawn heavily from her Bird by Bird which lives on my ancient, actual bookshelf, beside Buechner and Brueggemann, and bits of C.S. Lewis.

(What follows are not exact quotes from the book. They’re more Annie musing and me scribbling on the obligatory index card.)

Where to start??? Shitty first drafts!

How to write every day? Bribes & threats! (Gentle ones!)

How do you decide what to leave out? Deletion is a huge part of creativity!

How do you know you’re a writer? As soon as you stop not writing… you’re a writer!

I was, except for my knee, like a very happy Grammy after a platter full of stone crab claws as our time together came to a close and Annie went off to the next right thing… which I suspect had something to do with the puppy!

My next right thing was skipping a recorded meeting in favor of a knee-up, eyes closed event. This required background noise and I opted for music.

Joan Baez. In this case, a recording of a live concert held in Cesarea Israel in 1979.

And, yes, it’s time for the context brackets to appear!

Most of the songs were ones I had loved for years. Blowin’ in the Wind. Kumbaya. Dona Dona Dona. One about Jesus. Well, you get the drift. Some of them were unfamiliar.

Notably, one sung in Hebrew and another in Arabic. (Joan is a language genius!)

In Israel. In 1979.

And then the YouTube elves got busy and started sending random songs from Joan, and I hummed along, deeply engaged in untangling a new stash of red yarn… a Red Thread Guide graduation gift!

There came, as sometimes happens, a surprise! With God on Our Side.

This one was a bit of a challenge for me. The punchline was the assertion that God is on everyone’s side.

True confession time.

I set aside my yarn long enough to grab another index card and the first thing I wrote down was that God is on the side of everyone who believes God is on everyone’s side.

That was tempting, in this moment, but not quite enough. A bit of conversation with the Legendary Husband later, and some more literal and figurative unwinding and I was ready to edit my index card.

God is on everyone’s side… and weeps for those who can’t accept that.

And somewhere inside me, as I hung out with Annie and Joan in the context of this moment – and those moments gone by – I could have sworn that I was surrounded by glimpses of the Divine Feminine at work, even now.

Which caused me to wonder what it is that wants to be born in you? Or set free???

ps… looking for a writers’ retreat? Check out Heal & Create!

pps… so, given all the “context” issues of the moment, here’s a first glimpse at the Legendary Husband’s timely t-shirt! So hoping you’ll check it out!

“Raised Right” is STILL not enough!

Yes, I’ve told a piece of this story before, because some stories are important enough to come around again and again… and they often bring different messages in different moments!

Once upon a Sunday morning, quite some time ago, 11:00 arrived as it almost always does, and it was my turn to preach. There were a few challenges, that particular day.

It was a Sunday in October. A Sunday for which the Lectionary (a complicated calendar of which scripture passages are “for” which day) was utterly unprepared!

You see, in addition to it being the whichever Sunday in Ordinary Time, it was also Stewardship Sunday in our congregation, on Pink Ribbon Sunday for breast cancer awareness, in National Domestic Violence Awareness month.

Yep! Money, sex (well some people think so) and power all cued up for Sunday morning.

Three things you learned, if you were raised right in the time and places I was, not to talk about!

But I did. Because I couldn’t have lived with myself or faced the Creator of my understanding if I hadn’t. I mean, real people – struggling with those things – were sitting in our pews and not talking about those things wasn’t going to help anything get different!

This time feels just like that, somewhere deep in my raised right heart, which has learned a whole lot of new things in the last few years.

One of those new things I’ve learned is just how much politics is tied up with things like breast cancer research and treatment. And with things like domestic violence laws and enforcement… or not.

And then there’s the whole issue of who is real-enough to have civil and human rights. Today. In America.

It’s a really, really big issue and we’re not going to get it solved here, just now.

Earlier today, though, I listened to a recording of one of my Sister/Mentor/Teachers talking about these issues as they impact women and girls. I was scribbling pretty fast but this the center of what I heard:

Sisters… it is not our job to prove our worthiness but to CLAIM it! (Elayne Kalila Doughty)

I would add that it’s our job to protect our worthiness – our status as intentionally created humans – for ourselves and our sisters and all those who will come after us.

And, yes, politics is another of those things many of us raised right folks were taught not to talk about.

I’m not sure it ever worked. It certainly isn’t working now!

There was another thing Elayne reminded me of today. In modern/post-modern times, it’s only been about 100 years that women could vote and have resources in their own names and run for office and make their voices heard. And fewer years than that, in many cases, for people of color.

And maybe – just maybe – all the current political chaos is a planned effort on the part of way too many rich, powerful men to take away those rights and powers in order to protect their own agendas.

So, here’s my idea… let’s learn some of the tales of women who were wise world leaders in the old days. Back when raised right meant defending their families and homes and beliefs. Back when raised right meant learning and teaching and participating in world-changing events. Back when raised right women named Garsinde and Joan and Jacquetta and Boudicca and Mathilda and many, many Marys claimed their worthiness and changed the world for all of us.

And, then… let us, too, claim our worth and speak and lead and heal. And so it is. Here’s a glimpse of what that claiming looks like on my easel. Squint for today… she’ll be clearer soon!

ps… the top painting is deep under-layers of what became, about a year later, Grandmother Moon! And, it volunteered to step up and become a mug, bringing the colors of pink and purple ribbons for hope and – if you squint just a bit – a rainbow! Grandmother Moon insisted on a special offer – just for you and those you love – during the month of October!

pps… wondering what YOUR piece of speaking and leading and healing looks like? Here’s a fast, free, fun way to get more clarity!

Coming home to ourselves…

Hurricane Ian has torn a ragged path through Florida. Through the part that still lives in the box in my head labeled Home!

I am hugely grateful that my dear ones are safe. Shaken. But safe.

So many are not.

There was a woman on the news, blaming herself for how scared she had been. The primary caregiver for her paralyzed husband, unable to leave, she recounted strapping him to his bed and cushioning him with pillows for protection.

Then, as she told the story, she sheltered – terrified – under a table, unable to both comfort him and protect herself, so that she could continue to care for him. She shamed and blamed herself on national TV. And they both survived.

I wondered, as I watched and wept, how many times we do that to ourselves, with or without prompting from a hurricane.

How do we come home to ourselves, with or without a literal hurricane, and pick up our lives with new visions?

Here’s the place I’m starting in the figurative, largely chosen, path of the storms of my own journey. The journey represented by a painting called Legend.

No matter how many stories I’ve collected, how many diplomas I’ve earned, how many books I’ve read – and written – I can’t actually carry a Medicine Basket with everything in it. It’s time for some sorting and releasing.

And that’s okay. In fact, it’s a blessing. It’s a lot like packing for a trip and choosing to take along what works now. For YOU.

I won’t bore you with the leaving behind bit. Let’s just say that, for me at least, it’s lots of other people’s rules for other times and contexts. Also, lots of meetings about the way things ought to be.

Instead, along with my SuperPowers, I’m filling my Medicine Basket and calendar with space! Space for creating. For discovering. For helping others – just like you – along their journeys. For Love.

There are a couple of new vocabulary words in the basket. And a bunch of new symbols. And some ancestors who feel like they’re walking with me. They’re mostly in charge of helping to carry the courage, for I hear John Denver singing in my ear….

Coming home to a place I’ve never been before…

And, frankly, I have no idea what’s around the next curve! What I do know is that my calling is to put one foot in front of the other – in my own way – noticing and wondering and learning as I go. And being okay with the mystery!

My Medicine Basket is ready. And so am I!!!

ps… relating to the mystery bit? I hear you! And sometimes different questions – ones you haven’t encountered in just the same way and time – can help! HERE ARE SOME, JUST FOR YOU!

pps… Daphne has signed on for the journey, too! Bears are very good at the kind of courage which replenishes us with power. She’s slipped some energy for healing wounds and making travelers whole again into the Medicine Basket!

Standing between the worlds…

Or, what happens when Grandmother Moon skips the news!

I woke as the sun rose with this blog post all hatched in my head.

During my first cup of tea, I wore out a couple of index cards with notes. Here’s a glimpse…

  • The Equinox… harvest/shorter days
  • 92 F this afternoon… but low of 55 F by Sat. am!
  • The West Wing… signs in our yard
  • Lurking germs
  • Legendary… Actual!
  • Mystical cauldrons… Soup!

I even hunted up one of my favorite recipes!

Then, I re-read my writing exercises from yesterday’s Legend videos. The Holy Wow’s are coming fast! The excitement bubbles and the tears are coming fast, too. And, as is so often the case, I am the work in progress! (Which is pretty hopeful when you get right down to it!)

Then, I checked the news.

And tossed my index cards into the recycling basket!

Then, I made some more tea and spent some time communing with my #wip painting who/which reminded me that I have some experience with the whole liminal space bit.

And fished my index cards back out!

Then, time for what MSNBC calls breaking news…

The Attorney General of the state of New York is suing an ex-President and 3 of his children in “a massive fraud lawsuit”.

And… “In a national address, Russian President Vladimir Putin raised threat of a nuclear response in the conflict in Ukraine and ordered reservists to mobilize in an escalation of the war” (The Wall Street Journal).

And… another time out for ranting and raving! And more tears. But my index cards hung in there!

So… a glimpse of my first Legend Painting, complete with her mystical cauldron.

And a reminder that there’s a Phoenix rising out of that mystical soup cauldron. Often, actual ones, too!

Thus, as you probably guessed… a recipe!

Vegan Soup Stock

Makes about 6 quarts.

Note: Wash hands well with soap and water, and avoid putting hands near eyes after handling chili pepper!

Into a 10 qt. stock pot, place:

8 quarts cold filtered water; 5 med. onions – preferably organic – quartered, peels on; and 5 heads garlic, halved, with paper; 2-4 c. frozen, chopped okra, which is very healing to the digestive system. (Or a great use for those last pods in your garden that got big and stringy!)

Bring just to a boil, over med-high heat. Skim any foam that rises to the surface. Add:

1 dry, hot-ish chili pepper, whole; 6 fresh or 3 dry bay leaves; 1 med. bundle thyme sprigs -preferably garden fresh – tied with a white cotton kitchen string.

Return to a gentle boil. Reduce heat to moderate simmer. Cook, adjusting temperature as needed to maintain simmer, for about 3 hours if you want a very mild flavored stock, and not more than 6 hours if you want deeper color and flavor. Taste occasionally for heat from pepper. When it reaches the stage you want, remove and discard pepper. When you’re happy with the stock, remove from heat and cool to a little warmer than room temperature. Scoop solids out and discard. They’ve given their all!

Strain stock through a fine mesh strainer. Reserve 1 or 2 quarts of stock if you want soup for dinner or tomorrow and proceed with desired recipes or refrigerate.

Add your family’s fav veg (raw or roasted) to the broth and simmer as needed to serve! (I won’t tell if a bit of left over roast chicken, or even shrimp, joins the mix… it will all be great!)

Refrigerate remainder. When quite cool, package for freezing in 1 pint and 1 quart containers, depending on your needs. Leave about an inch of head space as stock will expand while freezing. Label and date! Store stock in freezer for up to 6 months.

Variations:

Place 1-2 c. freeze dried, mixed organic mushrooms into 1 qt. very hot water. Allow mushrooms to steep like tea for up to 2 hours. Strain carefully through cheesecloth lined fine mesh strainer. Or use a coffee filter in the strainer. (I keep unbleached ones just for this purpose.) Reserve mushrooms. Add liquid to simmering veg stock. Rinse mushrooms well under running water and save for soup or a rice and veg dish, etc.

If you have some, add a couple of corn cobs, corn removed, to the stock pot. I keep cobs in the summer when I cut corn off and store them in a zippee bag in the freezer. They add a subtle sweetness and a bit of texture to veg stock. Removing the corn simply is the best trick I’ve learned from Rachel Ray. Take a large bowl with a flat bottom and place it on or near your chopping board. Then take a smaller bowl, turn it upside down and place it securely in the bottom of the big bowl. (It’s worth experimenting a bit to find two bowls that make a stable pair!) Cut the flat end of the corn cob off straight and level with a sharp knife and place it on the inverted inner bowl. Hold the pointed end of the corn cob up and, using your sharp knife, cut the kernels from the cob in long strips, turning the cob, or the bowl, as needed until all the kernels are removed and waiting neatly in the large bowl. Fast, neat, and you don’t need to store extra gadgets!!! (slb, We Gather Together…holiday feasts with the family you have! )

ps… need a mythical cauldron with a phoenix rising out of it, or love someone who does??? ABRACADABRA! And shop around while you’re there! From now through Thursday, September 22 – the Autumnal Equinox – I’m sending 20% of ALL FierceArtWithHeart profits to make Georgia even blue-er! Get some inspiring art… from original canvases to mugs and hats for warming the season… and make a big difference at the same time! Commissions considered. Great way to shop for the holidays, too! (Stacey, Raphael, Hank, Lucy, Nikema, Marcus, Jen, and Bee will be thrilled!) Hurry!!!

Boxes… an owner’s manual!

One of our very early dogs was a black and white English Springer puppy whose AKC name was Wee Maude of McClellan. She joined the family when I was about 3 years old.

Being a bright sort, Maude quickly figured out that suitcases and packing boxes meant moving, which happened really often in those days.

By the time the moving van would arrive, poor Maudie was a nervous wreck.

I, being highly verbal by that stage, and a fairly observant sort, realized that the boxes and suitcases made Mom anxious, too. (Dad, as I recall, was often already off to the new land, and missed all the fun!)

One of Mom’s coping strategies seemed to involve lots of tape and magic markers. All our worldly goods, sealed up tight and labeled in huge letters, complete with information like Kids’ Room or Kitchen.

I, too, have become something of an expert at the moving bit, complete with tape and markers. And they really do make things easier.

Eventually, though, when I was a second year Seminary Student, I realized that the boxes stored in my head might work differently than the ones in the physical world.

It happened, as I’ve probably mentioned, after a student trip to Hungary in 1989.

I learned a lot beyond a very kinesthetic lesson on freezing feet!

The only metaphor I knew for what had changed in me on that journey to a very different world was the notion of boxes. In my brain.

They all fell apart.

After a while, I began to feel like I had the boxes mostly sorted and re-packed with some new labels.

Life went on. Marriage. Moves. Churches. A kid venturing from elementary school onward toward college.

Polity. Politics. Several doses of not from around here.

And I kept patching up the boxes.

More recently, though, that strategy has worked less well for me. Slowly, I realized that I was tossing some of the boxes, altogether. Re-labeling a bunch of them. And adding some entirely new ones.

Kind of like editing my mental library. Becoming a grandmother was a huge catalyst!

The pace picked up even more in the last few years, as I began to paint.

Neurologically, it no doubt had to do with processing history and events and ideas with more of my awareness. Rather like upgrading a hard drive!

Even more recently, the editing has become more and more about making choices, in the face of the world around us.

Some of the remnants from those old, old boxes weren’t working anymore.

Like the ones about who’s in and who’s out. About who gets to decide who gets to decide.

About love and healthcare and the relationship between faith and law.

There’s more… as you no doubt imagine.

Liminal spaces are like that!

For this moment… I get to sort and pitch and label the boxes in my head. To choose new things to add.

And so do you!

It’s likely that the world will keep moving and more boxes will be useful. And I have lots of ideas about how to put this metaphor to work.

And more cool tools to stash in my Medicine Basket!

For this moment, though, my new Legend painting is calling my name, complete with her chosen intention, which I can feel clear to my toes.

And that, dear friends, feels really good! (So does having my fingers in heavy body paint!!!)

ps… if you relate to the between-ness of life in this world and could use some help in the between spaces, let’s talk! I’m making room for three new individual clients. Curious??? CLICK HERE to find a time! (45 minutes as my gift. You bring dreams, questions, and a bit of red thread if it’s handy!)

pps… that new Legend painting has already gone to meddlin’ and you can help!!! From now through Thursday, September 22 – the Autumnal Equinox – I’ll send 20% of ALL FierceArtWithHeart profits to make Georgia even blue-er! Get some inspiring art… from original canvases to mugs and hats for warming the season… and make a big difference at the same time! Great way to shop for the holidays, too! (Stacey, Raphael, Hank, Lucy, Nikema, Marcus, Jen, and Bee will be thrilled!)

Editing with Red Thread…

I’m guessing you remember, as I do, the old days when people (like me) edited things with red ink and those quaint old conventions known as proof-readers’ marks.

One that’s probably still familiar is this one – # – which we now refer to as hashtag. It used to mean space.

And a personal favorite of mine – the ^ – which used to mean insert [whatever] here.

I was less fond of the actual red ink, implying that something was wrong, rather than an inspiration for making it even better. (A concept my son’s first grade teacher never grasped, no matter how hard I tried!)

In fact, I actively avoided red for quite a while.

Then, I wandered into the land of Intentional Creativity® and a whole new relationship to the color red was born.

Today, I am hearth tending in The Red Thread Cafe, on work-in-progress Wednesday. I love hearth tending!

Sisters from all across the globe posting their own work. To get acquainted. To be witnessed. Sometimes to ask questions.

(Once, when I was very new at all this, I actually got brave enough to ask for advice on washing paintbrushes and was met with a gracious fountain of wisdom!)

I like hearth tending even better when I bring along my red thread. The actual/virtual/legendary connection between willing people across place and time and lives.

Often, red thread comes with questions… an inquiry, if you will. The one I shared this day was about what we’re noticing and wondering as we work on our works-in-progress… and they on us.

I started my own day with dots. Dots of prayer and intention. (Surprise!)

And, between virtual excursions to the Cafe, I watched, with much of the world, as countless people gathered to pay their respects to Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II on her last journey in this world.

The first thing I noticed was overflowing tradition! All the talking heads attempting to explain the locations and uniforms and characters and ways we’ve always done it in the touching drama as it continues to unfold.

Then I realized that I was noticing as an outsider, surely, but also as an insider on many levels.

Outsider in that I’m not, as we say in the South, from around there.

Insider in that a great many of my genetic ancestors were, indeed, from around there. Names I know and names I don’t. (Names you would know, too!) And, better than the names, the stories!

Insider in that my first granddaughter was born in Scotland. (I was there!)

Insider in that I, too, have lost loved ones and planned funerals, trying to respect their wishes in a complicated, changing world.

Insider in that I, too, am a clergy person, counted upon to carry the traditions and the hope of faith in the midst of loss.

And, if you’ve known me more than about 10 minutes, you already know that I cried as I watched. And made finger knots in my ball of red thread as I began to see – through the CNN lenses and my OWN filters – new connections.

First, let’s recognize, together, that my filters are my own and I’ve been practicing editing them for a while. You, if you’ve been watching, no doubt saw different things and made different meanings. That’s the way it’s supposed to work!

Here’s just a smidge of what I saw…

I worried, during the processional through the streets of London, about the new King Charles and his knees. I saw orthopedic pain in his gait, along with emotional pain in his face. And I made some dots for him. And for all those who mourn.

I saw almost no face masks in the vast crowds and I made dots for the health of all the people. And the world.

And, when the choirs sang in Westminster Hall (which is emphatically not where the dog show happens) I saw a brown-skinned man with a head turban in the adult choir and Black and Asian boys among the children’s choir. And I made dots of hope for the world.

And, underneath the images, the news ticker ran on and told of Ukrainians taking back a large area of their country from invading Russians. And I made dots of peace for all people.

There was more… much more. The particular details don’t matter as much as the noticing and wondering, for that involves seeing more than we expected to see and being open to newness.

For this moment, a reminder of something you may have heard me say before…

Nothing that’s ever been written, in the whole history of the world, has been written without vested interest… and my words are no exception.

I will, however, own my vested interest…

I have two granddaughters growing up in this world!

I write these words which were, in some sense, given to me and which, in other senses, I’ve spent my life learning, in the hope that we might all notice and wonder. That we might see new things and be curious rather than terrified or hostile. That we might edit our filters with the red thread of our common humanity.

May Elizabeth II rest in peace. May the world grow in hope and love and peace, even as it changes, for it must. May you and yours be safe and well. And may abounding grace go with us all.

ps… the quilt at the top insisted on appearing today. It’s my Liberated Wild Geese quilt, named for the place where a traditional American block, known as Flying Geese, meets the Celtic tradition of Wild Geese as symbols of the Holy Spirit, pieced in the liberated style of the great Gwen Marston… which somehow makes huge sense for the Holy Spirit!

pps… I’ll be back soon with some more ideas about the whole filter thing. For now, let’s just say that if I had only one tool, it would be this one!

ppps… huge thanks to Shiloh Sophia McCloud and Jonathan McCloud for their courageous conversation, The Heart of Man, which is so deeply related to this conversation.